Friday, March 13, 2015

A Wheel of Determination

It was a Tuesday, I met an acquaintance on the way to campus. We had a good 15-minutes conversation. Both of us are from a similar background where coming to foreign land to study is not an option but a dream. Except, he would't even dare to have that dream. I do not know why but those words trigger some sort of emotion in me. 

Both of us made it here. We enjoyed the time here but for some reason, the sense of belonging is missing. I wish we could talk further but we headed to our separate ways. I spent some time in Hancock Library, somehow productive. I left Hancock to catch a tutorial with reluctance, not because of the distance but a guilty feeling. I'm getting used to the travelling between campus and my off-campus residential hall. It's tiring but it's worth it.

On the Union Court bridge, a man in a wheelchair, surged pass me. He had one of his leg bandaged and extended to the front, like a cannon. I looked at him briefly and soon, he was out of sight. There is a ramp, with a 30 degree angle of inclination to Manning Clarke Centre. Then I met him there again. He was pushing himself against the inclined ramp, making his way up. It was a long stretch of maybe 30 metres. His speed decelerated immensely. I can't imagine the force needed to roll the wheels to make his way to the top.

'Excuse me, do you need a hand?' 'No, thank you.' Somehow I felt the 'No, thank you' was uttered with some sort of ego that 'I can manage myself, I don't need your help.' I walked pass him and heard him groaned in exhaustion. I can't help it but to look back 5 times. I was afraid that he couldn't make it to the top. 

He has a strong will, he was slow but he did it. He made it to the top and I heaved a sigh of relief. I continued my journey to the College of Business and Economics building. I thought, if that man, physically disabled, can push himself to the obstacle, without a single help; why couldn't I? It is of a different context but it's the same concept. I have the drive, but not the determination. He had the drive and he had the determination. This is something I needed to fix in 2 months.

It was midnight. I called the escort service to my home. The driver I got acquainted to had finished his shift. It was a different driver this time and we engaged in a short conversation. A student left his/her laptop in the car and he said it belonged to a student who is aspired to be an accountant. I commented that it is a common degree to pursue in Asians as we are often told that accounting promises good cash and good job.

'Marry an accountant'
'Hmm, no, accountants are dull and rigid' - It's a bad generalisation but I really couldn't stand the accounting practices.
'Oh? But they earn good money'
'Yeah, but too dull'
'Well, my wife is an accountant'
'I'm so sorry, but erm I do meet people who really have a passion in accounting' - trying to lessen the awkwardness.
'Can't complain much, she earns good money'

I'd never speak again when I am worn out after a long day. But, I am always tired.


What a day,
Wen Xin