Thursday, May 8, 2014

I Want to Know What Life is.

Exactly this time last year, I put myself in a situation which I shouldn't need to be in. After all the pain and tears, it's like deja vu again at this time. It's that pang of pain and wave of tears, only this time, it hit me with double dosage. The optimism glass was empty that night. At every step I moved, I was pulled back with either procrastination or frustration. They say, if you want something so badly, you will work for it. I wonder what have I not done? The lyrics ringing in my ear  are giving me all possible descriptions and motivations. Like the one below by Foreigner.

I gotta take a little time
A little time to think things over
I better read between the lines
In case I need it when I'm older

Now this mountain I must climb
Feels like a world upon my shoulders
I through the clouds I see love shine
It keeps me warm as life grows colder

In my life there's been heartache and pain
I don't know if I can face it again
Can't stop now, I've traveled so far
To change this lonely life

I wanna know what love is
I want you to show me
I wanna feel what love is
I know you can show me

But now isn't the right time to evaluate or reflect. 'Take it easy' they said. I tried, but not when all of them come together at once. Things are fine the next day, it's still unstable but much better. God, give me the strength to go through these two weeks. Thank You.

Restoring faith and recovering,
Wen Xin