Thursday, January 27, 2011

Idol Fever

Knowing that I wouldn't have the mood to study, I shall blog. Was meant to blog about this last Thursday when it debuts it's first episode.

Yes, once again, every year, the new season of American Idol commences. And I never fail to catch it, you can say, I pretty much growing up watching Idol, but not cartoons, oh well, apart from Tom and Jerry!

Last season, when Idol shockingly announced that the 3 of the 4 judges were leaving the panel, including the much-beloved Simon Cowell, comments of 'American Idol would be so different without Cowell', 'Gah I don't have a reason to watch Idol anymore!' and 'Idol would be meaningless and boring to watch, not watching, hmph!' instantly filled Facebook's lives feed and a hot topic to talk about with friends.

New judges comprise of the talented Jennifer Lopez and rockstar legend Steven Tyler from Aerosmith, teamed up with Randy Jackson. They are the reason why we should continuing watching Idol. After 8 seasons of Cowell-Abdul-Jackson, 1 season with new Degenerous-Dioguardi, we certainly need a change to this 10 years old show. What do we expect from the outrageous vocalist Tyler and the multi-talented hot mom Lopez? It's something we need to watch.

Besides, Idol producer Simon Fuller certainly knows how to attract the audiences. With the impressive trailer on the first episode, multi changes as compared to the previous ones, star-studded judging panel. I am still and always an Idol fan. Furthermore, Idol has produced top singers like Kelly Clarkson, Carrie Underwood, Chris Daughtry, Adam Lambert, David Cook and so on. Is there a reason why we stop watching the birth of the next superstar idol and his/her wonderful journey?

Most importantly, Idol is definitely an inspiration to me. The stories behind the contestants really touched my heart and are making me shedding tears. We often complain about how difficult and miserable life is, but not knowing we are so fortunate if compared to others. We can definitely lead a better life, but we are blinded by the will of seeking sympathy, wasting time, not putting effort and many other stupid excuses.

May God bless the girlfriend of the contestant just now, may good health and happiness are with you. And to your boyfriend aka no-name-contestant, I shall find out about your name soon. Thank you for your life experience, it really got me thinking, 'DESTINY', an interesting topic which I still couldn't figure out after so long.


Sunday, January 23, 2011

Many and Much, with Buts.

I don't think I deserve an reward, but I decided to get Tokio Hotel's 'Best Of' Deluxe Edition, as a reward and motivation =)

Inspired by the starting of 2nd term of Year 12 tomorrow, I present you my 'manies' (plural for many) and 'muches' (plural for much).

So many stuffs on the to-do list, but time is not my best friend.
So much anger and frustrations in my head, but I can't scream it out.
So many things to buy, but I don't have the ability to find money yet.
So much thoughts in my mind, but I can't think properly.
So many dreams to achieve, but I don't have the confidence and ability yet.
So much fats in my body, but I can't shrug it off.
So many problems to worry, but the solutions are no where to be found.
So much love to give, but it is not the right moment yet.
So many questions on my head, but there are no right answers.
So much good music to explore, but I got only two ears.
So many responsibilities to carry out, but I am not committed enough.
So much crimes in this world, but I can't stop it all.
So many homeworks to do, but I keep on procrastinating.
So much tears everyday, but it never solve the problems.
So many movies and dramas, but I have missed.
So much falls for now, but this is life.
So many friends to concern, but they take it all and never give me back.
So much knowledges to pursue, but I can't know it all.
So many opportunities are offered, but I let it slip away.
So much efforts to put in, but where to start from?
So many disasters happening, but these are the punishments.
So much happiness I see, but pains are inevitable.
So many guys in the world, but it's hard to find the soulmate.
So much qualities I want from him, but I can't have it all.
So many issues I am interested, but I am learning bit by bit.
So much changes I have had, but there are more to come.
So many complaints I got, but I just can't shut up!
So much more to say, but I should stop before my readers run away!

Need many guidelines and much discipline to overcome the next 11 weeks. A bigger change ahead, a harder task awaiting, more fun to explore, a great challenge in the end, I hope I would be alive.


Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Say, all you need to say.

There is this one sentence, those 3 words, are always difficult for me to say. You might be reminded of Plain White T's 1234. 'There's only 1 thing, 2 do, 3 words, 4 you'. It's not that 3 letters. To even utter my 3 difficult words, it takes a huge courage from me. Sometimes, I would avoid a conversation or an argument, a comment or a post, a text or a call, because I can't say that word, it seems like the hardest word.

Yes, Sorry seems to be the hardest word.

The 3 words that I am refering to is 'I am sorry', it's the same anyway. Of course there is a reason behind why sorry is my hardest word. I used to apologise, like all the time. When I accidentally knocked someone on the street, when I blocked someone's path, when I broke promises, when I was not punctual, when I did something wrong, when I hurt someone with words, when I outburst during my foul mood, when I wrote a speech in someone's birthday card, etc.

Sooner or so, when I read a magazine article, saying about trying not to apologise so often. Then I tried to change the habit. But the main reason is due to my egoism, I don't want to apologise because I don't want it to be my fault, I don't want to be the loser, I don't want to be the people pleaser. Most importantly, I don't want to make mistakes.

You might say, human makes mistakes everyday and learn from them, so that it won't be repeated in the future. I agree with that statement, but I can't afford to make mistakes, I hate myself for doing mistakes. It's just, I am stubborn. And this explains why I hate to be late, there is a tremendous stress whenever I am late, but to date, I am still late to outings, I am changing this bad habit!


So, Sorry is the hardest word to me, what is/are the easiest word/words?
It will be revealed soon.


Monday, January 17, 2011

Phoebe's =)

16th of January, HAPPY BIRTHDAY

Thanks for the invite, as it symbolises 4 years of friendship still going on, after a year of different pathways, we are still staying togehter. And thanks to your parents, Kimberly and Marshal aka Stanley for the food, it was marvellous and I had great time =)

Just a little something to share with you ;)
The lady below.

Angela Montenegro, a fictional character in the series, Bones. The character is played by Michaela Conlin. This character reminds me a lot of you. She has a gorgeous smile, just like you; an amazing body, just like you; a passion for what she likes, just like you; most importantly, a great personality, just like you! Check her out, if you have the time.

Thank you for being such an amazing friend. You know I love you.


Sunday, January 16, 2011

After all, it changes again.

All the while, I thought my heart is strong, it is filled with thoughts, wonders and questions. Since last year, I have been searching for inspirations, to explore the world in a deeper level and to search my character and personality.

Before today, I stay strong with my POV (Point of Views) . I posted the daily inspirations on Facebook statuses or at times, seldom though, I blogged it. I was confident and proud with my POVs, until today. I discovered, I wasn't right. And to find it out, it takes courage, time and effort.

Today, a message came shockingly, and thank God things are all good. But one thing for sure, it changes my heart, not totally but a big part. It will give me a good think for days or weeks, and definitely change the way I think, the way I act and the way I live. You may wonder, 'why do you think things to be complicated'. My answer, because life is never simple.

You might don't understand this post. But this marks a significant change of my heart.

P.S. Phoebe, if you are reading this, your post will be next =)


Thursday, January 13, 2011

My facts, which you should know.

Thoughts came randomly when I was watching teevo, driving on the road, using the internet, basically my life. Here goes the list of what I 'discover' in these 2 weeks.

  1. Petrol station is the restaurant for cars. Shell would be a cheese burger because it is founded by a British transport company. Petronas would be a nasi lemak since it is local. Esso would be steak as it is owned by an USA company. I guess my family cars' prefer cheese burger :)

  2. Females love football is the same as males love porn/strip shows (some). Because somehow there is the physical attraction of opposite sex triggers the excitement inside. Oh well, Cristiano Ronaldo does have a strong sex appeal to make me watch him all the time last time. But of course, it's not just his looks, but also the skills and the personality.

  3. Humans feel insecure, that's why they have to be in a relationship or religion, or watching Star World's Monday Night Laugh like How I Met Your Mother to fill the emptiness in them. To fill the space in me, a person who loves and cares, God's words which guide and inspire or the character of Barney Stinson? I choose Barney, tell me who doesn't love him!

  4. Saying 'I love you' to friends is so easy like ABC until it confuses me whether it's true or not. It's so frequent until it scares me, makes me wondering about friendship loves. If I were to say 'I love you', I must be really mean it.

  5. People are narcisstic especially those who post 'I just shit' or 'Just woke up, good morning' constantly or daily on Facebook or Twitter. Posting random facts about yourselff occasionally is totally fine. But is there a need to tell the world you just fart or shit?

  6. I don't need 1000 friends on Facebook when I am only keeping in touch with 50 of them, hating 450 of them and not knowing 500 of them.

  7. Facebook is becoming a place to discover the truth, and it hurts finding out from there because it shows your friend prefers telling the world first before you. Especially if you thought he or she is a good close friend.

  8. Good and evil, rich and poor, strong and weak, tall and short, fat and slim, they all exist for a reason, because there is something call the equalibrium point. If everyone is rich, who is there to lose money to the rich people? If everyone is strong, who do you compare to show that you are strong? If everyone is good, we don't need polices and lawyers.

  9. The domination of males is still strong if you see the number of politicians in a country, the main characters in hollywood action movies and etc. Where do all the girls go, driving crazy at university or home trying to change the domination, screaming at and following Justin Bieber's world tour and being dominated by smarter/lovey-dovey guys. I am not critising the domination, but I feel it's weird. Yes I am sexist. But don't get me wrong, I love guys and I like Bieber!

  10. Listen to Taylor Swift's songs, read Sophie Kinsella's novels, watch chic-lit movies like The Proposal, When in Rome, makes us, especially love-searching teens, believe in fairy tales, ever-lasting love and true soulmate. But is it true? Marriages end with divorces, families ruin with abuse, relationships end with break ups and hatreds. My answer, yes for some, not for all.

  11. Lady Gaga is not just the Madonna in the 1980s, she is also the Michael Jackson. The trios who contribute so much to the music industry, will live forever.

  12. Humans are contradicting themselves all the time. Michael Jackson wanted to be a white and has become one while he sang 'no matter if you're black or white'. But, I love the music video! For us students it will be... During school term, 'Haiz, I want holidays so badly!'. During school holidays, 'I miss school :( '

  13. 100% of you reading this have opinions on the 12 facts above, 80% of you won't voice it out. C'mon, be the 20%, tell me what you think. My facts could be wrong. Leave a message at the chatbox or facebook message me ;) Be the 50, or u prefer the 450, but please not the 500. You get what it means :)

P.S. The facts are just in general, randomly popped into my mind in my daily life when I see things. I don't aim at someone and I am not trying to offend anyone. My sincere apology if I offended you. Tell me, I think I can accept. Haha. Hope you enjoy this post, it might give you a good laugh, a deep thought, a heavy argument with me or a new confusion ;)



Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Don't Say Goodbye. Don't Leave Me.

You will know a guy is worth it when he offers you his hand through hardship and his shoulder through sadness. He can be the one, the one who fills the emptiness in you, shares the ups and downs with you, and makes your life an interesting one. It is amazing, when you are totally hopeless, the saviour just appears right in front of you.

There was a tale in December, all the while I didn't know it's you. Now that you are gone, other than stalking you on Facebook, there is nothing else I can do anymore. Dear readers, it sounds like I am in love, but I can assure you I am not. It is just it is really inspiring during that time, the lyrics just come to me in 10 minutes, so I combine it with the song which is written for quite some time. Officially wrote on last Friday which was a significant day to this song, recorded on last Saturday in Yamaha Music Centre.

Last night I had insomia, perhaps it was the aftermath of posting the song. I put my iPod on the playlist. And it goes 'Watch You Go' by Jordin Sparks, 'What About Now' by Daughtry, 'Goodbye' by Miley Cyrus, 'The First One' by Boys Like Girls and 'Whataya Want From Me' by Adam Lambert. Cannot take it no more, shut it and go to bed forcefully.

For those who know, keep it to yourself. For those who don't know, don't ask, it's better to keep it that way. Thank you for the likes and comments, it really means a lot to me.


Saturday, January 8, 2011

Grenade? I Dare You.

I am currently addicted to this song. It is catchy and an emotional song. But I do not understand, does someone really can catch a grenade, throw your hand on a blade, jump in front of a train and do anything for someone? I know it's just hyperbole and the use of metaphore. But to sacrifice for love? Worthy? Even your life?

I trust you heard about the death of Alviss Kong. They call him great, I call him stupid. Sorry to say. I was inpsired by his death, and posted this on Facebook on December 10, 2010.

Sacrifice for life, but not love. Love with sincerity, but not desperation. Live for yourself, but not him or her. Die with pride, but not stupidity.

Those who die for love, drugs, stupidity do not earn my respect and do not deserve my tears. Although I admire the courage of commiting suicide, I can't imagine how devastated it is for a person to choose this never-ending path, but still, it is a human life that we are dealing with.

Appreciate life and live your life. Make it bright and loud. Make it YOUR life.



Inspired. Refreshed. Reflective.

There is one moment, perhaps the only moment, which I feel totally relaxed. When I am in the gym, working out =)

I feel inspired everytime I sit beside the glass door which reflects heat at the member lounge, viewing Suria KLCC's main entrance and Jalan Ampang's traffic, sipping hot coffee and write a post in my diary.

I feel refreshed everytime I finish the 1 hour group exercise session, where a group of enthusiastic people battling with weights or jumping while catching some breaths, and end with a group clapping.

I am reflective everytime I meditate in the sauna room and the steam room when I see no one as I close my eyes, concentrating on my plans, problems or memories.
I want my body to be healthy and slim, my mind to be bright and positive. And I look up to the fantastic women below. I feel like a pervert or a lesbo while googling the pictures, but oh well, they are my inspirations!

Eva Longoria and Cameron Diaz for their well-toned arms.

Megan Fox and Jessica Alba for their smooth-muscled back.
Nicole Scherzinger for her slim waist.
Su Min, remember we used to call her Zinger Burger? Hahaha.

Shakira for her hard-core abs!
I used to look up upon Gwen Stefani's, but dang, no way to six packs!

Gisele Bundchen and Mirander Kerr aka Mrs Orlando Bloom's long stretchy legs.

Thanks to Mom's Fitness First club membership, I get to enjoy weekends free gym usage. You might wonder 'why her arms still so flabby?', 'damn look at her spare tyres!', 'her legs are like elephants' legs!'. For me, working out is not to look like those women (partially yes, haha), but mainly, I want to be healthy, plus to look good in clothes.

I don't crave to have buffed-up arm muscles. I don't need a sexy back. I don't hope for 22-inches waist (Actually I do). I don't work out for six packs abs. I don't dream for leggy supermodel legs (I cant, my height!). But what I know I can achieve is a healthy lifestyle and slim body with sufficient exercises, and balanced diet.

And you can! Come join me at Fitness First every Saturday and Sunday for free, only for first timer. It would be great, working out together, free flow drinks at the member lounge and a walk at KLCC after that ;) Contact me if interested, anyone, close friends or not-so-close friends, just be my gym mate for a day :)



Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Guide me, will you?

A trip to Genting on the 15th of December, for the very first time, I watched a movie in the cinema alone. The choice of movie: Narnia. Never been a fan of Narnia, never would.
But as I was seeking inspirations as usual, the movie actually taught me something.

Defeat the darkness in you,
before exploring the darkness of the world.

There's a darkness in me, or should I say, darknesses. I suppose everyone has.

Yes, discipline. I am not discipline enough. It is something that I struggled since two years ago. I was way so disciplined during my PMR year, sort of like my glorious year which I would never forget.

This 2011, a crucial year, the path to the future. I need to discipline myself, very much. Updated a list of resolutions for the year, to achieve the numbers are not an easy task. But I seriously have to, must discipline myself for the focuses.